Effigies

My wife works in an elementary school, and like any elementary school, the children work on projects that are often put on display in the hallways. Every time I visit, I find something amusing hanging on the walls. Today, I was creeped out.

The halls were hung with effigies of American Presidents, created in a variety of media by 4th grade kids. One of the most popular (and eerie) methods was to stuff a real business suit and then glue some kind of head on it.



All I could think about was that in America such images aren’t burned in the streets as often as they are in other countries.

Here’s Andrew Jackson. Apparently, the student read somewhere that he had “silver hair.” So Old Hickory’s image was graced with an aluminum-foil helmet, which probably helps shut out the voices in his head.



Teddy Roosevelt is resplendent in a cowboy outfit. But viewed from the side, it’s clear he’s just an empty hat:





This is Groucho Roosevelt, Teddy’s comedian brother, who looks worried about the company he’s keeping:



Tricky Dick Nixon looks positively cartoonish, slinking around the corner:



I was amused by this image of JFK, who appears to have been thrown up against the wall by juvenile delinquents who want his lunch money:



Here’s George W. Bush, performing “Burning Down the House:”



My favorite was Bill Clinton. Here’s the full-length view, drawn in crayon on a large piece of cardboard:



Here’s his well-polished trademark smile:



But the diligent student who produced this image included one very important detail.



In my opinion, this is almost a good likeness of our 42nd president. Close, but no cigar.